Slow-dancing in a burning room

Short Story Sunday:

I watched her walking away from me, her heels tapping a seductive rhythm and her hips trailing an invitation. Her riot of untamed curls danced in the breeze and I longed to bury my nose in them. To breathe in that alabaster fragrance she usually wrapped herself in had long been a temptation.

The worst pain I had ever felt was looking into her eyes and watching her heart break. I’d always known I’d do it. It had been on my to do list, just above Hitting Rock Bottom.

 3 years since I’d last seen her. Everything had changed and yet nothing had.

 I listened to the comforting sound of my slowing pulse the further away she became. Maybe if I were lucky my heart would stop, the finality echoing in my hollow shell. I’d just drop to the pavement right here on Everdeen St, scaring the hell out of passerby. She weaved between the other pedestrians to stop at the corner awaiting the light. Here was my chance. A better man would chase after her. I was dying without her and I knew it but I couldn’t take her down with me. I turned and began my retreat, leaving the future I wanted in the past I hated. 

The air thickened around me and an electric current tickled my spine. That nearly ever-present feeling of danger greeted me. No one else ever felt it but I knew it to be very real. It was the reason I usually kept my senses numb with layers of substances. Rubbing the nape of my neck, I peered around myself for the menace or victim but nothing and no one in particular stood out.  They never did and it didn’t matter anyway, I was never able to help them.

I was standing in the middle of the sidewalk in front of the Palazzio Palace apartments like a boulder in a stream watching the current pass me completely oblivious to the encroaching danger. I knew better than to chalk this up to paranoia but I was just beginning to relax when I heard the screech of tires on asphalt. There were screams and shouts for assistance as people rushed to the scene of the accident. My only thought was maybe I should have chased after her. Then Death could’ve claimed us both.

KILL BILL

I am not planning to kill anyone named Bill and I don't recommend that you do so either.
However, I was oddly inspired by the heroine of the movie. Beatrice made her Vengeance List, tapped into a well of inner strength and determination and focused her energy like a laser to reach her goal.

I usually have a ton of disjointed ideas and thoughts floating around in my head so the ability to focus is a Herculean task. I have taken to making lists and setting deadlines as alluded to in my previous post on the 4Hr workweek and Tim Ferris's Dreamlining recommendation. I am finding that this simple act is working like a charm.
Killing Bill would be my goal. So jot down your goal, be specific.
Now comes the first step. Some would say start small but I feel that getting the large task accomplished first will make the rest a breeze. That first task would be my Oren Ishii.
In the movie Kill Bill, Oren was in my opinion Beatrice's best opponent. Even actually Killing Bill was a skate after Oren. So tackle the large hurdle first. You can't half-step with Oren. Bring your Hattori Hanzo sword. In other words, bring your A-Game.

An example of my Kill Bill Death List and my Oren:

Drop half of my current body weight
1. 1 hr of excercise a day

I have already dropped appr 25lbs in the last month so I'd say I'm on target.
One step that is on all of my Kill Bill Lists...Reward myself for a job well done.

Envision the goal, the destination. Remember to plan and enjoy the journey.

Understanding Men

So I'm reading a book by TD Jakes called "The Lady, her Lover and her Lord."
The book is to offer inspired advice for women who want to enrich their relationships with themselves, their men and their God.
Now, even though this is geared towards women I honestly think a lot of men would love this book. I think it would help them to understand a good woman's heart a little better. I could be wrong but I think Bishop Jakes adequately speaks for Men, the things they need and want etc.
For example he talks about things such as if a woman wants her man's love, if she truly wants to protect his heart like we all should (as his rib) then she must first earn his trust. Not just in the sense that she will never cheat on him but he has to trust her not to run and tell all of his business to her friends. Which I personally always thought was foolish anyway. That's his business, not theirs. He also has to trust that she won't change. Men like to know what they're getting.
My Great-grandma passed that down to her girls. She told us "You start out the way you can hold out." If you start a relationship one way such as catering to him, picking up after him and the like, don't change the game 3 months in. Now you're giving him dirty looks cause you don't wanna pick up his drawers. "Start out the way you can hold out."
But back to Bishop Jakes...He goes on to say how if a man's trust is violated he shuts down. We all know men communicate differently so he communicates how he feels by the fact that he will just shut down internally.
There is so much more to this book but I really wish I knew some men who'd read it just so I could get their opinion on it.
For instance: Did you know that apparently most men hate satin sheets? Bishop Jakes hilariously clarifies how men can't seem to get their ...purchase or balance on satin sheets, 8 )
If you've read it, pls share your thoughts.

Selig #BeSilly

Old English word "selig,".  Its literal definition is "to be blessed, happy, healthy and prosperous".

Silly is a derivative of Selig.
We all need (and I stress the word need) a dose of silliness in our every day lives.
Why so serious? Take a load off. Tranquillo.
I could list a lot of facts about laughter.
I could quote some brilliant minds, but I won't.

Instead, I dare you to take a 30 min Silly break every day. Seriously, stop being so serious.
I know you're a super-adult. You've got bills to pay, children to raise, alibis to consider...
but it'll all be less stressful if you learn to laugh again.

Here's a few of my fave videos to get you started:

Go to this site if you think you're a movie buff :

http://www.cool-movie-trivia.com/


Read this hilarious Blog:

http://www.abeerfortheshower.com/2011/06/i-dont-miss-working.html


Or just predict your own #FinalDestinationDeath via twitter.
Eg: While filling up at the gas-station, I'm clicking the pump handle which causes a spark that ignites the gas. #FinalDestinationDeath.

Whatever floats your boat. Just take a silly break and enjoy it.

Hey DJ

I miss good music. Music feels so...one size fits all today. The masses are celebrating entertainers that are "Bold" and "Original".  Even their supposed originality feels manufactured and purposely geared for shock and awe. Everybody's trying to go for shock value to deflect from the serious lack of genuine talent. Vulgarity + sex= Platinum hit.
Don't get me wrong, I enjoy current hits but I miss the true artists of yesterday or just the simple but good songs. What the performers did in days gone by were true works of art. The definition of individuality. There are no other MJs, Boyz II Mens, Princes Madonnas or TLCs (just to name a few).
Even though I may enjoy some of the dime-a-dozen entertainers of today I know very few of them will have longetivity.
Seriously, when's the last time you bought an entire CD?

Good Music...
Most of the following are from the 80's, what?
I'm an 80's baby.

A few artists that you at least bought one album by:
Michael Jackson, Nirvana, Boyz II Men, Whitney Houston, Madonna, Prince, U2


Some songs are time-machines:
Take on Me- A-has ( I'm 5 years old trying to understand this video and wondering when Care Bears comes on again)

Air Tonight- Phil Collins (this song was featured in The Hangover but I first heard it on an episode of Miami Vice) Oh, Don Johnson and Philip Michael Thomas were gorgeous.



How about "Cool like dat"- Digable Planets (plaits, twists or braids)
Mr. Wendal- Arrested Development ( I still don't know what they were saying at the end of this song but that doesn't stop me from singing a long)

Remember songs that made you feel.
Even if you had never had the exact experience you felt the music:

In too deep- Yes Phil Collins again, the man's a genius.
Waiting for a girl- Foreigner
Open Arms- Journey
Hard to say I'm sorry- Chicago
Man in the mirror- Michael Jackson
End of the road- Boyz II Men ( I sang that for all I was worth and I had never even talked to a boy romantically yet)

Lastly, there are songs that will still make you pull a muscle trying to do the Roger Rabbit or the Cabbage patch:

Pretty much any Michael Jackson song (hence the Michael Jackson experience)
It takes two-  Rob Base & DJ Easy Rock

Motownphilly- Boyz II Men
Wooh Hah- Busta Rhymes
Now that we found love- Heavy D
Baby Got back- Sir Mix a lot (Oh my God Becky)
Ain't too proud to beg- TLC (I didn't even know what I was beggin for)

This might be an Obligatory Plug but I seriously go to FYE http://www.fye.com
to buy and sell my movies and CDs. I can usually find anything I'm looking for, no matter how old. Check em out.

What's some of your Time Machine songs?

   


         

Getting from Here to There

"Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"
"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," said the Cat.
"I don't much care where..." said Alice.
"Then it doesn't matter which way you go," said the Cat
― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland




Without a clear destination in mind we'll find ourselves as confounded as Alice. I have always had many dreams and wishes. I've come to realize that it's very easy to wish and dream your life away. But if I want to actually experience the fantasies in my head I have to make them happen. So where do I start? Which way do I go? 
Well I had to ponder that for a few years. 
Then after becoming completely frustrated and disgusted with my inactivity I let my frustration be my catalyst. I did what I do best, I turned to books.
I went to the bookstore and picked up a copy of Tim Ferriss's 4 hour work week.









When reseting your internal system he recommends you ask yourself, "What do I want?". Big or small, name it and seriously don't be afraid to dream big. After-all you only have this one life to make it happen and it isn't too late unless you think it is.


"Whether you think you can or you think you can't. You are right." - Henry Ford


Just to give you an extra cheesy layer of inspiration:


But the world is full of zanies and fools
Who don't believe in sensible rules
and don't believe what sensible people say
And because these daff and dewey-eyed-dopes
keep building up impossible hopes,
impossible, things are happening everyday.' 
-Whitney Houston "Impossible" lyrics


So jot down the goals and keep them where you can see them daily. 


If you're a Perpetual Procrastinator like myself it might be best to create a dreamline. Break the goals down into steps and set deadlines to fulfill each task. So my goal is to complete my first novel and maintain an informative and interesting blog, (work in progress, I know) One of my steps to reach that goal is to write for one hour a day be it commercially or creatively. I've given myself 3 months. Not realistic? Personally, I can't give myself too much of a window. As a procrastinator I need deadlines or my inner Scarlett O'Hara will rise, "I won't think about it now. I'll think about it tomorrow."


Now you may want me to provide more of Tim's insight and I will later but creating a dreamline should take thought and careful consideration. 
What do you really want? Start Here.

Crazy Stupid Love?

Is the notion of never ending love & commitment between a man and a women stupid?
I am surprised to be asking this question at this point in my life. I always thought of myself as a romantic. I thought that I wanted the picturesque marriage with 2.5 children and a dog. I just turned 30 last week and it seems that there was a shift.  I've never been pressed to be in a relationship. I swore off dating unless the person was worthy of my time at the young age of 21 and kept to it. I did believe I would've met someone I'd consider dating before now but still I'm ok with being single.

But I find myself asking, just where the modern day notion of love originated.

One of my favorite movies is Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind starring Kate Winslet and Jim Carrey:

They're two people who could not be more dissimilar. She, Clementine, being the free-spirit and Joel being the lost puppy mired in mediocrity. They find each other and almost accidentally begin a relationship. They were two incomplete people seeking solace in each other. When things go south, they opt for a new medical procedure which allows their memories of each other to be irretrievably erased. There is more to the story and I have not ruined the ending for any who have not seen it. However, with this latest musing of mine I find myself thinking of Joel and Clementine as good illustrations.
"Opposites attract" but why?
Is it that we are actually seeking completion within but believe it can only be found without? Why do we look to another to be the Yin to our Yang? Shouldn't we strive to be whole and complete before joining our lives to another or beginning a partnership? What if the Yin & Yang make a whole within one. I mean, what if the whole concept is finding completion in the realization of all the that you are.
It seems it would be easier then to meet a friend along your path and walk together. Should you decide to part you can do so as friends wishing each other well on your journey.

What are your thoughts?

Crazy Stupid Love?